FIND YOUR FIRE

I did some powerful journaling this morning where I really came back to my "why." 

It's getting harder lately to motivate myself in business and life when everything is going so well. I truly have created my dream life- but I'm left feeling a bit apathetic and unfulfilled day to day and I was trying to get to bottom of what's missing. (I realize this is a truly privileged "problem" to have!)

I realized, that prior to this moment- accomplishing my goals was driven by willpower and motivation to be someone/somewhere that I wasn't yet. I was driven by the idea of being successful, inspiring people, getting to the next level. 

But then I got there! I am married to my soulmate, I have the dream business with total time freedom, I have the money, I have the home, I have the dream pregnancy. It's not as motivating anymore to go for "more" when I already have so much. 

I was finding it hard to come up with content for blog posts, and podcasts- thinking that it's all been said before. I was struggling to word things in a new way where you guys would find that fresh burst of inspiration. But I was unable to find that fresh burst of inspiration no matter how many books I read- so how could I motivate you? 

Until today when I just got so clear on WHY I still want to take my life to the next level- because I still have the desire- just not the "fire" so to speak. 

It's not for the bigger house or being a homeowner.
It's not for having more money in the bank or more followers. 

It's because I want to live life to my absolute fullest potential. I want to be the best version of me. I want to do everything that I can each day- so that I go to bed fulfilled, happy, proud. I want more, not because I actually want more- but because I know I'm not living up to my full potential doing the bare minimum and hardly exerting myself day to day. 

I was finding it hard to motivate myself because my focus was on creating more of what I already had. An analogy: When you already have an abundance of apples, you aren't going to be that motivated to walk to the store or find ways to get more apples. You aren't even hungry! Why push myself when I have all the apples I need right now?

I don't know if this makes sense haha- but I realized that it's not about the amount of apples. 

It's about BEING the best version of me each day! Which means challenging myself to get more apples; not for the apples- but for the EXPERIENCE. Because I will then think creatively, get out and pick them, meet new people in the process, find new ways of doing things, challenge my body, grow as a person- and go to bed feeling like I did all that I could that day. 

I miss the feeling of pushing. I loved training for a marathon SO MUCH because it was a challenge. I loved growing my business so much because I was constantly creating and innovating. I loved learning as much as I could do I could do more and be more. 

But then I lost sight of the experience and only focussed on doing more and being more- and then got to the point where I had it all, and it all felt a bit.. pointless. 

So- moving forward, my only goal- is to be the best version of myself everyday. To challenge myself and reach my full potential day after day. To be a little bit better, a little bit tougher, a little bit more of ME. To focus on the experience of growth, to live for consistently elevating myself because at the end of the day- it's fun. 

I don't want to go through this life and at the end feel like I still had so much more left in me. I don't want to have any regrets! I want to be the best person, wife, mom, friend, daughter, sister I can possibly be and THAT is truly motivating. 

My question as I move throughout my day is- How can I be better? How can I can elevate this moment? Is this my full potential? 

For example this blog post was born because I set a 25 minute timer and it only took me 7 minutes to do the thing I had set to do. Instead of just shutting down my laptop I decided to take full advantage of this 25 minutes and do all that I could! I'm going to finish organizing and cleaning out my closet in order to be better today. I'm going to record a podcast episode (finally!) I'm going to add some running intervals into my walk. All day long I'm just going ask myself if I could do a little bit more- and then do it without question. 

So... what is your why?